My Journal

By Harriman Nelson

20D

It wasn’t too long before we’d submerged to avoid the topside traffic that a very agitated Emily called me via her cellphone. Indeed, as I’d expected, the brazen brigade had made the internet and CNN.

My only saving grace as a member of the male gender, as far as Emmie was concerned, was that I hadn’t been topside at the time. But as owner of the boat, she was livid that I hadn’t stormed up on deck right away and shooed the ‘brazen hussies’ off.

“I’ll admit things got out of hand, dear,” I said, or tried to say during her tirade, “O’Brien and Chip were trying to maintain control, but in all honesty, what could they do? Physically throw the girls overboard? They’d be damned if they did, and apparently are damned since they didn’t…but…yes, I realize it looks bad for the institute and…yes, dear….yes, dear….but…but…yes, the deck cams were on...sweetheart, don’t cry…they were on to check on the offloading of supplies…no, dear, that was the only reason I caught a glimpse of them…sweetheart…you’re making a mountain out of a mole hill…but….but…”

“Everything okay in here?” Lee asked quietly from the open doorway, his damp curls attesting to his shower, “I heard shouting….”

“Emmie’s on the phone,” I said, handing my cell to him.

“Everything okay, Emily?” he asked and began to listen politely, turning a bit red. “I went topside as soon as I could….well, of course I enjoyed the view. Any man would…er…no, I don’t think Harry was watching for long,” he lied. “He was concerned about our supplies getting trampled on…we lost about $300 worth of fresh fruit and vegetables….”

Lee spoke so innocently I would have believed it myself except for the invoice of goods received and stowed on my desk, with ‘no visible damage’ recorded by Chip.

“Excuse me, skipper,” O’Brien, his hair damp as well, said from the doorway, “official business for you.”

“Sorry, Emily, have to go. Ship’s business…no, it’s NOT convenient. But it is necessary…you can’t be serious! Of course I’m not going to use part of that girl’s bra as an eyepatch!” he shouted and handed the phone back to me and fled.

 “It’s me again,” I said, interrupting Emmie who was still arguing. “Lee really had to go. No, I don’t know what the official business was, but as captain, he has to tend to it quickly…what do you mean we all have sex on the brain? Now, Emmie, calm down or I’ll have to hang up and I’d really rather not. I want to tell you that I have more pearls…yes, lovely pearls. In fact, Dr. Hewlett of the Hewlett Sea Lab is coming over to help me catalog the clams and the pearls…yes, his daughter-in-law is coming over as well to check on Mallie. What? My dear, animal psychology is a legitimate occupation. The cat’s been attacking the crew. No, we’re not giving her Lee’s eyeball back! It might very well have been some kind of chemical reaction to make her need a shrink…supper? Steak and potatoes, with asparagus with Hollandaise. Cookie’s making it from scratch now that we have some supplies….I only wish I could have supper with you. Alone, with soft music and candlelight. In fact, dear, I’ve been wondering. The island’s beautiful. If we can’t buy a cottage by the sea near Santa Barbara, we could take our belated honeymoon here and rent a cliff side bungalow…oh, maybe a few weeks, even a month or so…yes, I’ll check the local real estate companies right away…no, you don’t have to go topless…but, you can if you like…”

 O’Brien announced over the PA that we were nearing the sea lab.

“I have to go, sweetheart…yes…I’ll call back as soon as I can. Love you,” I added, ending the call.

I knew we weren’t actually that close to the sea lab, just near enough to give credence to the fib we were going to use about our instruments picking up oxygen leaks.

I retrieved some of the pearls from the lab that I didn’t want Hewlett to see as I wanted them to adorn my Emmie as soon as we got home. Hewlett might try to convince me to let him keep them for further investigation.

It wasn’t long before Lee had Chip launch the flying sub to go pick Mrs. Hewlett and her fiancé’ at the agreed upon dock. Then they’d head to the sea lab to pick up Dr. Hewlett.

I joined Lee in the Observation Nose just prior to the flying sub’s arrival. Lee was wearing a colorful eyepatch over the temporary eyeball. I was about to ask him about it, when I remembered the girl’s bras, so he’d decided to use it despite what he’d told Emmie. I was surprised it didn’t look in any way feminine. Rather it was a yellow fabric with green stripes. And it didn’t look like a bra cup at all. I had to wonder if Lee had done the cutting and stitching himself or if he’d drafted Katie who we all knew was good with a needle and thread if the Christmas pillows she gave as presents meant anything.

Lee had already greeted our guests upon their arrival by the time I joined them in the Observation Nose.

“May I present Admiral Harriman Nelson,” he added.

“Do I call you Admiral?” Dr. Hewlett asked. “Or do you prefer Harriman or Harry? It’s a bit confusing as I’ve heard you’re called all three depending on who’s doing the talking.”

“Whichever you prefer.”

“Commander Morton’s been telling me that he’s never seen such clams as the ones you collected. Too bad about their toxins.

I’ve dealt with such things in my studies. The toxin might be easily neutralized. Only now that you have more food, you probably wouldn’t want to go to the trouble…”

“Right now, I just want to see if the clams are a new species,” I said.

“And we want to see Mallie,” Ira White said, taking his fiancé’s arm.  A clear signal, or so it seemed to me, to Chip and Lee that the woman was off limits.

“Excuse me, Skipper,” Chief Sharkey interrupted, “our instruments are picking up what could be oxygen leaks from the sea lab.”

“I’m sure there’s no problem,” Dr. Hewlett said. “I have an alarm system the habitat builders installed that would have indicated any problem.”

“Even the best of systems fail,” Lee said. “If you’ll excuse me, sirs, ma’am, I’ll send out a diving team for a perimeter check.”

“It’s really not necessary,” Hewlett said, irritated. “I wouldn’t want to take you away from your many duties.”

“It’s no problem. Chip? Why don’t you go get Mallie? Mr. Ames?” he called out toward the Control Room, “please join our remaining guests in the Observation Nose.”

“Is he always so polite?” Ira White asked as Lee headed aft.

“Afraid so,” I said. “I’ll leave you both in Mr. Ames’ capable hands while Dr. Hewlett and I check out the clams.”

“If you’ll allow me to make a little visit first, Admiral?” Dr. Hewlett asked.

“Oh, of course. Patterson? Please escort Dr. Hewlett to guest quarters A to freshen up. Then bring him to the lab.”

I nodded toward Sparks after they’d disappeared and I headed aft myself. It was possible Hewett only had to pee, but I doubted it. Not after the way he’d acted about Lee’s plan to check out the perimeter of the sea lab.

 I closed the lab door behind me as soon as I reached it, and turned on the signal Sparks was picking up.

“It’s just a perimeter dive. They won’t be able to see anything,” Hewlett was saying, probably from the cell phone that he’d been wearing on his belt.

“They’d better not. You shouldn’t have sent your assistants ashore.”

“No choice. The world, even my daughter-in-law believes me to be a recluse. “I know Seaview’s arrival is a damn nuisance. But I could hardly keep the sub away or decline Nelson’s invitation to come over.”

“What about our schedule?” a deep voice, with just a touch of a foreign accent asked.

“You can pick up the next supply of ZK7  when the sub’s gone and not a problem.”

“Dr. Gamma won’t be pleased about the delay.”

“Gamma does my bidding, not the other way around. You’d do well to remember that.”

“Very well. He would like to know, however, if the admiral’s clams are worth anything.”

“If they’re as toxic as he claims they may prove a welcome addition to our bio hazard weaponry. As for the pearls Nelson mentioned, well, call those an added incentive in claiming them for our lab. I have to hurry. I’m pretending that I’m making a call of nature. Out.”

“Sparks?” I spoke through the private intercom line, “send the recording to ONI. They’ll take care of contacting the Aussies. Get me the captain.”

“Harry? Sparks sounded agitated.”

“Hewlett is in league with a Dr. Gamma. In fact, he’s in charge of Gamma and all his minions. They’re working on developing bio hazards.”

“For germ warfare? Ouch. But it makes sense. The X-rays have been picking up what looks like a secondary lab and  command center underneath the sea lab’s foundations and what looks like might be a tunnel to the sea caves. We’re about to go down.”

“Well, be careful. Especially regarding something called ZK7.”

“That the germ?”

“Just one of them, I fear. Don’t touch it. Don’t open it. The Aussies will be taking care of things.”

“Right. My eye’s already begun transmitting what it sees. Good luck keeping Hewlett in the dark. Out.”

It wasn’t long before Patterson knocked on the door and announced  Dr. Hewlett was ready to assist me.

I unlocked the door.

“A man after my own heart. I keep my secrets under lock and key as well.”

“I’m sure all we scientists do. Well, there they are,” I pointed to the specimen tanks.

“Marvelous…simply marvelous….”

I allowed him to pick out one of the clams, and we began to investigate. He was smitten with it.  Not so with the turtles. The growths were completely normal and that I should take them home with me for further study. But I had more important things to do, such as eavesdrop on whatever he reported, and to see just how Operation Mad Cat was going.

It wasn’t, apparently, as there was no Chip and no cat.

Until, that was, Riley, jumpsuit torn and hand bleeding, staggered down the spiral ladder, sucking the blood off of the back of his hand.

“Mallie just attacked me again!” he yelled. “Don’t know how she got out of Mr. Morton’s cabin! He’s got a lot of us looking for her.”

“My God,” Mrs. Hewlett said. “That’s one bad cat. Let me see your wound.”

“That’s okay, ma’am, I’m heading to Sick Bay. Mr. Morton just wanted you to know there’d be a delay getting the cat here for you to diagnose.”

“The problem,” I said, making my appearance known, “is that she’s not a bad cat. She’s very sweet. It’s just suddenly she’s been having these little episodes.”

“Is it only certain crewmen she’s attacking, or, is it random?”

“Well, so far,” Ames said, “she’s attacked me three times, Jackson, two, and Lee, well, he won’t admit how many times. As for Riley, this was the first.”

“Do all of you have something in common?”

“Well, I’m Lee’s assistant at the institute. Joe’s on leave from the active Navy and goes way back with him. We’re all colleagues and friends.”

“Do you treat the cat the same? I mean, in approaching her, petting her, feeding her?”

“I can’t say we treat her any differently from each other.”

“Divers coming aboard, Admiral,” O’Brien called out. “They report the oxygen plumes were just natural vents in the surrounding sea bed.”

“I told you there was no problem,” Hewlett said as he approached with Patterson. “Just stretching my legs, Nelson. I agree that the clams are too toxic to willingly seed or harvest them. The pearls, however, are probably worth a great deal. If I might borrow one or two to check with a gemologist I know?”

“Of course, Dr. take your pick. But, let Patterson photograph them for my records.”

“Certainly, oh, by the way, where’s the cat?” he asked Mrs. Hewlett. “It’s what you came to see, my dear, wasn’t it?”

“The cat’s disappeared. I don’t suppose you’d mind if I joined you in the lab?”

“By all means,” I said and was about to lead Dr. Hewlett and Mr. White  aft when Chip walked down the spiral ladder, Mallie, purring  in his arms.

“Ah, the lady in question,” Mrs. Hewlett said, “she seems very content in your arms.”

But as if to give lie to the words, Mallie jumped out of his arms and lunged toward Ames’ ankles, grabbing them, her mouth at the ready.

“Ow! Ow!” he yelped, grabbing her, which made her yeawol. After all, he wasn’t letting her lick the invisible chicken liver or steak  juice on his skin.

“Not again,” Lee said, approaching with Joe, both the men’s hair wet, and still buttoning up their shirts.  Joe tried to take the struggling cat out of Ames and Chip’s hands when she squirmed, and pounced onto Lee and literally began to crawl up his chest.

“Yowch!” Lee responded, turning away, hiding the fact, I was sure, that Mallie was happily licking whatever Lee had applied just below his neckline. Chip ‘helped’ remove her.

Then she launched herself toward Joe’s ankle.

This time the boys made more of a show of it as they and some of the Control Room crew tried to ‘pull’ her away from the savory delights that anointed the men.

 “Are the attacks always like that?” Mrs. Hewlett asked, as Chip finally managed to take Mallie aft.

“Yeah,” Joe said, rubbing his hair, “no reason at all.”

She began to sniff the air, then sniffed Joe and Lee.

“Do you men share any personal products? Hair tonic? Soap? After shave?”

“Well, yeah, sometimes,” Joe said. “When we forget to bring our own, and stores are low, like this cruise.”

“You think she’s reacting to that?” Lee asked.

“None of you did anything to incite her to attack that I could see. And certain chemical formulations will induce a reaction.”

“Wait a minute,” Lee pretended to muse, “only a few  of us had that damn itch from a recent dive and have been using Doc’s disinfectant ointment.”

“Ah,” Mrs. Hewlett said. “I’m no chemist, but I think you may have your answer.”

“Well,” I clapped my hands. “Lee, you, Ames, and Joe go soap and shower it all off. Tell Doc what happened. Riley was also attacked and will need to shower as well. Then meet us back here for supper. I’m sure Cookie will be setting things up here soon. Dr. Hewlett? Mr. White, let’s go pick out those pearls for you.”

Supper in the Observation Nose is always a popular pastime, regardless of Seaview being submerged or on the surface. Mrs. Hewlett preferred the surface, of course, and we were soon enjoying our steak and potatoes. A leafy salad dressed with Cookie’s home-made vinaigrette, and an especially good Australian wine completed the entre’. Home-made apple pie and vanilla ice cream (store bought) finished things up.

“Uh oh,” Chip said as Mallie sauntered down the spiral ladder, “how’d she get out again…I’ll take her away.”

“No need,” Lee said. “If she doesn’t attack us now, we’ll know for sure it was the ointment and not us. Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty.”

With that he put some of his ice cream on a separate plate and lowered it to the deck.

“You know, milk products aren’t really good for cats,” Mrs. Hewlett said.

“Yeah, Chip told me, but she likes it, don’t you, sweetie,” Lee said as he stroked her.

In between slurps she began to purr.

“Never ceases to amaze me,” Ira said, “that no matter the name, most people usually end up using the term ‘Kitty’. Wonder where it comes from etymologically, that is.”

“1500’s,” Ames said. “Was an affectionate derivative of Katherine and of ‘kitten’…Angie told me.”

Mrs. Hewlett came around to the cat and bent down to stroke her. “You are a sweet little kitty, aren’t you. But why the name Maleficent?”

“It fit, at the time,” Chip said apologetically. “Remember, she was a stray. Hard life. She had to learn we weren’t going to hurt her.”

“Yes, of course. I remember that now.”

Mallie enjoyed all the attention, and followed the light pointer that Mrs. Hewlett had brought along. Finally, tired out, Mallie yawned and fell asleep on her lap.

“Thank you for the fine meal, Admiral,” Dr. Hewlett said. “I’m a bit tired of pre packaged meals one heats up in a microwave.”

“You’re most welcome,” I said, trying my best to be polite to the man who wanted to use toxins to maim or kill some of mankind.

“I’m sorry the clams are worthless as a food source. I can take them off your hands if you like. For further study.”

“Thank you, no. I’ll be donating them to the Smithsonian,” I lied. “Well, it’s getting late. Chip, go ahead and power up the flying sub. I’m sure our guests would like to go home.”

After Chip had returned from off loading our guests ashore and  at the sea lab, I called the Mad Cat actors to an impromptu debriefing in my cabin.

“You were all fantastic,” I said. “I’d have sworn the cat attacked you and that blood on Riley’s hand was real.”

“It was, sir,” Riley said. “Doc had a little of mine in stock, so it wasn’t dangerous to ingest a little. Anything for the team, sir.”

And so, I’m almost finished jotting this all down in my journal, as Seaview heads for home.  We need to be well away from the Hewlett  Sea Lab and out of anyone’s mind before all hell breaks loose when the Aussies raid both it and Dr. Gamma’s lair on the mainland.

As far as the world will know, we were only near the sea lab to get help regarding my clams.