My Journal

By Harriman Nelson

10. Mixed Signals

By the time Chip and I had changed back into civvies, and were ready to return to City Hall, Lee had apparently also come back to the boat.

His back was to us in the Control Room as he lectured O’Brien, who was geared up for some kind of hiking trip.

“Remember, keep to the trails. No spelunking on your own as much as you may want to investigate any other caverns. I had to sign an official agreement, and in triplicate, that we’ll all be good little boys and follow the rules. Understood? For some reason our hosts seem to think we need reminding.”

“Yes sir, but…”

“Well?”

“What about not having at least two officers aboard Seaview at all times? Mr. Morton’s going to have a cow when he finds out.”

“Leave Chip to me.”

“Why bother?” Chip interrupted, making our presence known, “I realize, Captain, that you have some prerogatives about bending the rules, however, I would have liked to have been informed of your plans. And you’ve apparently forgotten your agreement utilizing my title rather than my name in front of others.”

“Dismissed for shore leave, Frank,” Lee said, as he initialed the shore leave clipboard, and added, “have a good time.”

I could almost hear Chip’s blood boil in the time it took O’Brien to climb topside and out of earshot. Then Lee turned to face his nemesis.

“One, Commander, you’re correct in that I do have some prerogatives. In any case, you were unavailable to be consulted, and with myself and one of our CPO’s aboard, it won’t do any harm for O’Brien to get away for a few hours. Two, you’re welcome  to put me on report if you’re so pissed off about me calling you Chip even by accident. It’s going to happen occasionally, you know. I can’t change years of habit in just a few day’s time. Anything else? Or should I place myself on bread and water to save you the trouble of that pesky report?”

“If I hear one more snide remark between you two,” I snapped, “I’ll set you both adrift and let you find your own way back home! I hope I’ve made myself clear. Now, come along, Chip, I’m sure Miss Bates and Mrs. Crane are wondering where we are.”

 “Skipper?” a topside sailor called through the PA. “The Admiral and Mr. Morton need to hurry. There’s a storm’s brewing.”

In minutes we were topside and heading down the gangplank to the waiting car. I almost stumbled, my mind was in such a whirl.

This thing between Lee and Chip just couldn’t continue. If they couldn’t come to some sort of truce, I might have no alternative but let one of them go. And that was unconscionable, even if it was a foregone conclusion that I would never let Lee go.

A  few minutes after we’d entered traffic,  a shiny black limo passed us from the other direction. A very familiar vehicle. And there was only possible place it was going. The hairs on the back of my neck rose to full attention. Chip’s must have as well for we both yelled “Stop! Follow that car!” in unison.

Surely surprised at our outburst, Peabody made the U-turn but kept whatever thoughts he had about his crazy Yanks silent. Within minutes we were pulling next to the limo at Seaview’s dock.

Not bothering to follow established protocol, Chip and I darted from our car, ran up the gangplank and practically slid down the ladder into the Control Room. Chief Sharkey looked at us, surprised.

“Where is he?” Chip demanded

“Er…”

“The captain, Chief,” I explained, “ the captain, where is he?

 “In his cabin, sir but he asked not to be disturbed.”

That did it. No horse at the Kentucky Derby could have sprinted faster than Chip and I as we ran to Lee’s cabin.

“No!” I yelled as I entered without permission, “you’re not going on another....”I stopped myself as I saw the lady with the ring.

“Busted,” Lee sighed. “Madam Prime Minister,  may I introduce Admiral Nelson? Commander Morton.”

I decided to take the bull by the horns, protocol be damned.

“Are you or are you not, ma’am, requesting the services of my captain on some kind of cloak and dagger operation?”

“Harry,” Lee warned.

“Now, now, dear,” she patted his arm, “I suppose they just can’t help themselves. No, Admiral, Her Majesty’s Government in Bermuda is not requesting Captain Nelson-Crane’s services. I,  however, requested a tour of Seaview and he was gracious enough to comply.”

“But MI-6, Scotland Yard….”Chip muttered.

“My, we have been busy little spies haven’t we.”

“I want in on mission details,” Chip said.

“You heard her. There is no mission!” Lee yelled. “MI-6 and Scotland Yard made a call while I was filling out forms, that’s all!”

“I don’t think they believe you,” she said. “But he’s telling the truth Admiral. You were certainly right, Lee, when you complained about them being mother hens.”

Lee groaned. I was sure he wasn’t pleased she’d revealed that little tidbit between them.

“Lee also told me,” she continued, “ that you were probably thinking spy stuff when I first asked to see him. Of course I wanted to meet him. The captain of an American submarine visiting our country had a number of official compliance rules to agree to. If you must know, we’ve simply been talking tea since. I decided it would nice for him to  enjoy a real cup of British tea, with a Bermuda twist, of course.”

It was only then that we saw the two teacups on the desk and a small bottle of rum.

“Tea, um…yes, of course,” I stuttered. If the deck had opened up and swallowed us it would have been a welcome relief.

“I know how you Yanks usually prefer coffee, but I believe I’ve opened the captain’s eyes to the pleasures of a more…intricate brew.”

“Did you know, Harry,” Lee said, taking a sip,  “that while there are only a few varieties of shrubs, it’s the processing of the leaves that makes so many differences. A very welcome change from my usual coffee, Maggie,” he said raising his cup in salute.

 “I believe I have a convert!” the PM said, delighted.

“Excuse me,” Chief Sharkey said at the door, “you ready for more boiling water, ma’am?”

“Only if Lee…if the captain would like another cup. I really must be going,” she said, rising, as Lee did in like and took her arm. “Thank you again for the tour, captain. I hope we meet again after your expedition, Admiral. ”

“She called him Lee,” Chip said, after they’d turned the corner in the companionway. “And he called her Maggie.”

“You noticed that, did you,” I replied, and returned to Lee’s cabin.

“And he brought her here.”

“Not enough time if that’s what you’re thinking. And I certainly doubt it. Still, all’s fair in love and war, Mr. Morton.” I sat down in Lee’s still warm seat. “Might as well,” I added and gulped down the last of Lee’s tea.

“Well?” Chip asked as if I’d swallowed poison.

“Not bad…in fact,” I added, as I poured some rum into the empty cup and took a gulp, “not bad at all.”

I didn’t know what was taking him so  long before Lee returned, hands on his hips as he looked at us.

“Well, are you just going to stand there, or yell at us?” I sighed.

“I’d like to. I’d certainly like to, but what good would it do. Do you mind?” he grabbed the rum bottle of rum out of Chip’s hand.

“You snitch his booze, don’t see much difference if we snitch yours.”

“That’s different. I believe my mother and Miss Bates are waiting.”

“They don’t need us to research the files,” I said and took the bottle out of Lee’s hand, which Lee just as quickly took back.

“No, but this is your expedition. Now, get going. I’d like to save some of what’s left in that bottle.”

“Bossy, isn’t he.” Chip said.

“Part of his job description,” I replied. “And we’ve hardly made any headway with this Rum, Lee,” my words vying with the contents. “But I must say this is very fine stuff.”

“Out,” Lee ordered. “Your driver is bound to be wondering what’s taking you so long, not to mention the ladies.”

“Pick, pick, pick,” I said and grabbed Chip’s arm pushing  him out of the cabin.

“And I’d appreciate it,” Lee warned, “that you quit hounding me about the spy business. Something that neither of you are very good at, apparently.”

“We’re only concerned about you, Lee. Him too,” I added of Chip.

“Only because I’m responsible for the smooth running of the boat when you’re off on assignment.”

“Naturally, Chi…Commander,” Lee said. “Don’t forget to log out.”

“Not necessary, Captain since we never logged in,” Chip said with a hiccup and I just giggled.

“Oh swell,” Lee said and clicked the mike. “Chief? Please escort the Admiral and Commander topside and to their car. I don’t want them to fall off the gangplank. And get me City Hall.”

“Aye sir.”

“More hanky panky with the Prime Minister, Skipper?” Chip leered.

“No. Just going to warn them to have some strong coffee waiting for you.”

“Rather have some more of that Bermuda tea, Leewie” I said.

“I give up,” Lee said. “Chief?” Lee said into the intercom, “Change of plans. Heat up what’s left of this morning’s coffee. Tell the driver he can return to City Hall then get it touch with Sgt. Nelson in the archives.”

“Aye sir…is anything wrong, Skipper?”

“No, only that they’re both tiddly!”

“Tiddly, wiggly, swigly,” Chip sang.

“I see what you mean, sir,” Sharkey replied.

“Just tell Sgt. Nelson that we had…technical issues with the boat that I requested both the admiral and commander help me with. If anyone wants details,  invent some technical jargon nobody will be able to understand. The more complicated, the better.”

“I’ll go,” I managed to slur, “Chip can stay here.”

“Absolutely not. You’re almost as drunk as he is.”

I don’t remember much of what happened next. But I awoke atop Lee’s bunk, a cold pack on my forehead. The aroma of coffee filled the air. I think I moaned from the ache in my head.

“About time,” Lee’s voice brought me out of my daze,” “You okay?” he asked as he sat on the edge of the bunk and patted my hand.

“I…I think so,” I said as he helped me sit up. “Oh, my head…just what kind of rum is that? I feel like I’ve been a week long bender. No wonder they like their Bermuda tea… …oh…my head.”

“You’re only supposed to add a teaspoon of the rum to it, not almost a full bottle, well half a bottle each I suppose.”

“Oh….um, what time is it?”

“Tomorrow by your calendar.”

A knock on the door interrupted.

“In.”

“Oh, good,” Chip said, looking a little the worse for wear except he was in a crisp uniform and had shaved. “Glad to see you up, Admiral.”

“How are you, lad? I asked.

“Well, considering the fact that my eyeballs are keeping time with the pounding in my head, I’d say as good as can be expected.”

“As soon as you’ve showered and changed,” Lee told me, “you’ll be driven to the archives.”

“But..”

“Miss Bates and my mother were very understanding about us having a problem with our flingeflow valves and shorts in the computer necessitating you remain aboard to help me fix it. But they hope you’ll be able to join them in the archives today.”

“They found something?”

“Yes, and there’s more stuff they want you and Chip to see.”

“How many times,” Chip began, then winced from the headache.

“Stow it Mr. Morton,” Lee said. “Just stow it for now. Contact Sgt. Nelson at City Hall and request a car…did you hear me?”

“Sort of…something about a car…kind of an echo in here.”

“Oh good grief,” Lee muttered and clicked the mike, “Sparks, contact Sgt. Nelson at the City Hall that the admiral and commander are requesting transportation. Then ask her to tell Miss Bates and my mother that they’ll be there shortly.”

“Aye, Skipper”

“I brought a clean uniform from your cabin, Harry. Fresh soap in the head. Figured you might not want to walk all the way to your cabin with that hangover.”

“Um..thanks…er Lee? Where did you sleep?”

“Sleep? Spies don’t need sleep.”

“Look, I’m sorry about that. Now, really, son, did you get any sleep?”

“Actually I spent the night in town after O’Brien got back. Got in some really nice skin diving this morning.”

“Uh huh,” Chip smirked.

“I am not having an affair with Maggie, er, the Prime Minister, Chip!”

“My name is Commander! Oww.”

“Serves you right.”

“Boys, if you don’t mind,” I said, holding the bunk’s frame for support as he trod the few steps to the head, “some privacy is in order…”

“I’ll be in the Nose with Edith,” Lee said, “having some Bermuda tea,” he mocked as he left, closing the door.

“I’ll kill him!” Chip said

“I don’t suppose you mind waiting until after my hangover’s gone?”

“Oh, yeah..of course,sir…I’ll um, go get another cup of coffee,” he said and left me in peace.